The changing of the season has been hard this year. I love Autumn, & this year it has been especially beautiful. With this season, however, come lots of reminders of Leah. I remember specific days while I was pregnant & enjoying every minute with her.
I remember people I saw, conversations we had, hugs that I received, tears that loved ones shared with us, etc.
We have learned a lot & grown a lot in the past year. In ways that we didn't really want to or even know about a year ago. We know a part of each other that is hard to know, yet so good too.
I still feel awkward in social settings. It's still uncomfortable for me. I like to talk less & just sit back and watch more. Grief is tough to deal with in multiple settings, much less talk about it. Not everyone gets it. Stuff that seemed important at one time is not even on my radar as remotely important anymore.
We are approaching Dec 5th rapidly. I wish time would slow down a bit so I could have more time to get emotionally ready for it. We plan on spending the day with each other. Nothing big or major. True to our style, I suppose. Just us. And our memories of Leah. It will be a special day. Honoring her.
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3 comments:
Praying for you and love you both so much!
First of all glad to hear your friend is doing well and hoping she continues to have a smooth recovery.
Will definitely be keeping you guys in my thoughts and heart as Leahs day approaches. I too still feel awkward in some social situations, its so hard to hear others talk about their babies or pregnancy, just makes me sad. And as you said I too feel some things are so unimportant having lived through losing Lily. Thinking of you and sending love ((hugs))
there will be others honoring her too that day. love you.
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